Where have all the booties gone to?

WHERE HAVE ALL THE BOOTIES GONE


There is a new culture revolution happening and its been happening for a few years now. At first it started popping up around major cities in the Northeast. Now it has spread to every known place within the continental United States. It is on its surface so discrete that only those with a trained eye, and a connessuer of sorts could spot it on the horizon. Now it has reached epidemic levels to which I fear there is no turning point. What is this you ask….I dare not speak its name….No Booty Revolution.

This No Booty Revoultion was always in place for who um er…lack enough melanin to retard the suns ravaging effects on their skin (y’all know who I’m talking about). But it has now I fear spread to the last stalwarts of the Booty, the guardians of the traditional exhaltation of the posterior, people of African descent. Yes, there are a few of us who keep the old traditions alive and well, who not only exhalt the rear end up are possessors of its power. Yet this select few has been dwindling for years now. This revolution was very slick I tell you very slick, in the 80’s and earlier on shorts where just that short, pants were tailored and slender in cut so that those who possessed a bountiful backside were able to bring light into the world by showing what God and they Mama had blessed them with. But in the early 90’s under the guise of safe sex campaigns and a new thug culture, baggy clothes came into style. Promoting the use of excessive fabric to cover up the body and the power of the B double O t-y. At first people thought it was trend and a style that would go away, but here we are damn near 16 years later and still no end in sight to the sloth like look. Conjointly, there must have been a cataclysmic change because for some reason one day it seemed Black People lost our collective ass.

I cannot tell you how it pains my soul to see long back Black who cannot even fill out a pair of LEVIS in the back, All I do is shake my head in shame. What makes it even worse is that there is no collective outrage at this pheomena. Which has struck both men and women, a damn shame. Nothing perturbs me more then when I’m dancing with someone and they turn around and start to grind and all I feel is their coccyx grinding against my pelvis., many a times I have had to just stop dancing because it was just too painful physicadlly and emotionally to go on.

What kills me is how people want to act like now our European brethren are no gaining what we once lost, this is a fallacy. This is just another deception of the epidemic, our Anglo-Saxon counterparts did not gain anything! Rather that we lost so much! When is Tavis Smiley, Keith Boykin, and all these so called leaders going to start addressing the real issues, where have all our booty gone.

Even the entertainment industry is lamenting the loss of the booty. Sir Mix-A-Lots ode to the beauty of booty was actually him waxing on sorrowfully because he cannot find what was once plentiful. When Cash Money sang Back that Ass Up, they are asking women to show their beauty for they knew, they knew that the booty was diminishing. Even the women are noticing that now having a rump is nowhere near as good as it used to be, Erykah Badu’s lyric in a song called Booty sums it up “Your booty may be bigga, but I still can pull yo’ nigga”. A hot shitty mess that small back, no booty having girls think they can now take a man away from a girl who has more than enough to fill out any pair of jeans.


But there are a few of us holding down the fort, fighting against the anti-booty epidemic ravaging our community, namely Big booty Keisha, Buffie the body, and Me. We all possess and know the power of what we have, the force is with us…..is it with you?