Wise & Young

Thursday, October 06, 2005

AIM conversation with Law-Boi

Okay maybe I'm wrong for doing this, but I really need help maybe someone can look at this and tell me did I handle this right or wrong. I'm trying to gain some positive information from this exchange, feel free, in fact i IMPLORE you to post what you think I should have done.

Law-Boi: hmm, thats interesting
ME: k
Law-Boi: what do you hope to get from hosting a blog?
ME: just read it
Law-Boi: i did...i know you said that you wanted to start dressing in buisness casual as opposed to urban thug and that you want to see who you attract as a result of the difference...and all of that is interesting
ME: good
Law-Boi: whats good?
Law-Boi: good that i read it?
ME: yes
Law-Boi: but i didnt really see the "why"? why you wantd to host a blog, thats all, thats all i wanted to know
ME: what is a blog
Law-Boi: what you hope to acheive from hosting the blog and even more extendedly, what do you hope to acheive with dressing differently...i know what you want to observe, but what ultimate result are you looking for? to change your attitude, your outlook, the way people preceive you, etc etc
Law-Boi: i am sorry, i dont mean to pick at you
Law-Boi: but it's cool...good luck with all of that
Law-Boi: are you upset with me?
ME: no not at all
ME: but Law-Boi you have to just let things flow sometimes
Law-Boi: ok
Law-Boi: I understand what you are saying, i really do
ME: thats something that you need to work out
ME: *on
ME: like you're intelligent no doubt about that but this isn't the spanish inquisiton
Law-Boi: ok, i see what you are saying
ME: i mean you're funny, handsome, and inquistive which you should never change. But like the the last time we wer talking about something I said that I really didn't feel like talking about that anymore, you kept asking why and whatnot. I was really put off by that b/c certain things sometimes need to be left alone, remember that can put people off.
ME: its not just you, but its alot of folks i've been running into lately i don't know where this is coming from.
Law-Boi: I am intentionally very pressing on you and your ideas. I deliberately try to dig deeper to figure out what is going on, not b/c that is so much a part of my personality, but rather becuse i get the impression that you seem like you are trying to figure things out
ME: I know you are
Law-Boi: i listen or read what you are saying
Law-Boi: and i wonder if you really know what you are talking about or where you want to go
ME: my mom is a psychotherapist, its like growing up with Yoda aint' too much you can do that aint be done
ME: that was incredibly condescending
ME: wow
Law-Boi: i didnt mean for it to be condescending and sometimes meaning can get lost in aim, but i just get this impression that you are trying to figure things out
ME: okay ": and i wonder if you really know what you are talking about or where you want to go"
ME: you don't see anything with that statement
ME: okay well letl me help you out, Law-Boi, and let's dig deeper.
Law-Boi: i do...and i apologize...i didnt mean for it to come off that way
ME: I wonder if you really know what you are talking about let's go after this phrase first. The very idea that someone can pontificate and wonder if someone knows what they are talking about has the connotation that they are more attune and aware of things that the author, me, is unable to comprehend. Also look at the subject matter of the blog, which is me and my journey, and for you to then say i wonder if you really know what you're talking about, also is condescending b/c that supposses that I do not have knowledge of self, but that you are more aware of who I am with only knowing me for a scant month. The fact that you even think you can know a modicum about me means that you think I'm pretty easy to understand and flat and one demesional
ME: which then means that you don't think I'm wise
ME: or in the process of gaining knowledge
Law-Boi: not at all, as a matter of fact...i asked because i didnt know and i wanted to know and know that you have the answer
ME: In fact if you truly think about the questiosn that you've asked me the reason why I don't answer most of them isn't b/c I think they are stupid or whatever
Law-Boi: if you are reading all that into it, than you need to look at whatever insecurities are feeding that...i dont pretend to know more about than you know about yourself...i dont even know you
ME: its mainly b/c you are asking them and contacting me when they are convient and doing only surface questions asking things that you are interested in asking for superficial reasons not really getting to konw me as a person
Law-Boi: and thats cool, if you think the questions are stupid...they might be
ME: they aren't stupid
ME: you know what, you really didn't read my blog b/c i put you in there as well.
ME: I guess you didn't get that far
Law-Boi: i read the link you sent me
ME: scroll down
Law-Boi: and i am sorry, i mis read what you wrote a few lines up
ME: no problem
ME: also its not taht i'm insecure about certain things, its what you've presented in your line of questioning
ME: you haven't asked me anythign about my family, friends, background etc. Which I have about you. You've asked me about celibacy, what i'm up to, and career goals
ME: all via aim
ME: when was the last time you took the time to call and actually speak
ME: i understand you're in law school, and that you're achieving and going to achieve great things, but at the same point if you were really trying to get to know someone more than on a cursory level than your actions would speak louder than words.
Law-Boi: the reason i never really took more of an effort is becasue there was nothing about you that struck me or wanted me to take more of an interest. i wanted there to be, but there wasnt...but at the same time, i didnt think it would be cool to just stop calling or forget that i knew you...and now that i think about it, i think that reason why i was so inquisitinve or asked you so many questions is because i wanted to push you away...i dont do that everyone, in fact not really anyone else right now in my life.
Law-Boi: and i do owe you an apology for that, bc that wasnt the way to handle the situation
ME: wow goodbye
Law-Boi: i did read your blog with the section about me and it does feel good to know that you felt the same way
Law-Boi: ciao
Law-Boi signed off at 11:21:35 AM.
Law-Boi signed on at 11:33:35 AM.
Law-Boi: I will say this: you have given me a lot to think about...i never meant to make you feel like you were just a diversion for me or that i could only pencil you in. I will def be more cognizant of how i treat people from here on out...so thank you for that
Law-Boi signed off at 11:34:43 AM.
Law-Boi signed on at 11:35:11 AM.
ME: um...remember you're trying to block me, take me off your buddylist for it to work fully.
Law-Boi: ok cool! thanks for the tip :-) i'm not real aim savvy. have a good life
ME: you two, i know you'll succeed in all you achieve.
Law-Boi: and i know you are an intelligent, insightful person who is going to go a lot too...and will have a happy life, the most important thing of all
Law-Boi: now, i just took you off my list, why are you still popping up...ugh
Law-Boi signed off at 11:39:48 AM.


  • Damn, dude sounds like an asshole...

    By Blogger BMass, at 12:05 PM  

  • I definitely have been in your shoes. One thing that I love about your blog is that you not afraid to tell your raw emotions.

    I can't say if you were right or wrong. You are you own person. But, i will tell you how i would have handle the situation.

    I would have called first three consecutive times... by the third time, I call and he doesn't call other than returning a call. It's a wrap, he is trying to tell me something. Secondly, I wouldn't want someone I'm involved with reading my blog, because it can't get mess. I'm telling you from experience. I've dated two bloggers, after the first one ended.. i really went off on my blog.. the second one, I learn i just have to write it down for myself... but, its all good.

    As much as Law-Boi may have been a great person... he was just not for you... he wasn't willing to give you what you needed.. and that sucks... I know that filling oh to well.. when you are with someone that is about doing something in their life and they just don't act right... but, my brother.. handle your handle... see the light down the tunnel... there is someone out there for you.. i have to tell myself the same damn thing... it gives me HOPE... with hoping for the better, it gives you strength to keep on LIVING.

    your brother in the struggle,



    By Blogger Unconquerable Soul, at 9:41 AM  

  • You're on the right track as far as expressing your emotions, just remember that not everyone is worthy of it. he sounds like a real jerk, nothing gained nothing lost. good luck.

    By Blogger chase, at 2:47 PM  

  • What a jerk!!!!!!

    By Blogger Rashid @ Old Gold Soul, at 8:22 AM  

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