EXCITED

Yo I am so excited its not even funny…I’m sitting here at work and its 3:30 pm and I can’t wait to go to class, go home, get my dry cleaning and then pack, clean my house, and then GO ATL tomorrow dawg!!!!! Man I tend not to get excited I’m really excited like a kid on Christmas Eve….I haven’t felt this way in years….I hope that I’m not hypin’ myself up. Only time will tell.

Monday

Well the countdown continues I’m really excited about going to ATL, if nothing else this is my first trip to the south. Granted I grew up in Norfolk, but depending on who you talk to that’s the south other times its just the mid-Atlantic. Plus I keep hearing all this hype about ATL on various levels. Some people are saying that ATL is THE place to be if you’re young, black, and gifted. Others say there are mad gay men of African descent there, for better or for worse. Its interesting the same ones who lament that there are too many gay men, still flock to places where there are a lot of gay men…hmmm a quandary.

Also for the past few weeks I ate at this Chinese restaurant, and let me tell you their fortune cookies be on POINT…at least the fortune here is what they have said:
“You have a natural grace & great consideration for others.”

“You will travel far and wide for both pleasure and business.”

“Versatility is one of your outstanding traits.”

Boy them cookies be tellin’ all my bidness lol….

Speaking of business…I met with my cousin and we talked about something that could definitely be great experience, we’ll see soon enough. I’ll definetly keep y’all abreast of the situation……

Then I went to the good ole gym. Yesterday was chest day, so I was like I’m gonna go hard. But tell me why, yesterday it was CROWDED, it took me a good 20 mins to wait for a Smith machine to become available. So I ended up doing other excerises instead for my chest. Just a little background information, I tend to do bench press frist b/c I have this hing where I need to do those first b/c that way I know Ii did a really good chest day. Otherise, I feel as if I somehow cheated myself. But I digress, so I did the bench press when it became available. What really brightened up my day was that two guys who do not know each other, or at least they don’t speak, both said they could see the change in my body since they’ve seen me. The first was this guy who I always talk to in the gym, he’s pretty cool laidback, before I even started to lift he was like he can see the difference. I was like well aight thanks! I mean I’m not going to the gym for other people, but its nice for someone to say they can see the difference in your body. Then after him, I ran into this other guy who I’ll call him pro-activ guy. The reason why I refer to him as pro-activ guy, is because the first conversation I had with him I noticed that he was using that. Let me tell you, that brotha’s skin was PERFECT, I was like dang maybe I need to use pro-activ. Also why did I think he was at oldest 28 this brotha says he’s 35. I’m like see that’s whats up. Pro-activ is one of those people that in regular clothes he doesn’t look big, in fact looks kind of small because of his build, but he’s CUT and pretty diesel actually. I guess by now with all this ranting on about him, I had/have a crush on him.
But I digress, I saw him after not seeing him for about a month or two, and after we said our pleasantries, he said I can tell that you’ve been working out. I was like dang two in one day that’s whats up. So I thanked him and went back to what I was doing. I mean honestly it did give me more motivation to push myself harder. What’s interesting to me about the gym, is that there are MAD goodlooking dudes, in shape dudes there, Yet for the most part most of them are or I think are single. I wonder if the old adage is true, what looks good isn’t always good for you.

Sick like a dawg

Today is Friday, and I feel sick as a dog. My throat is scratchy, eyes are watery, and I feel like I'm going to throw up. Great and today I was suppossed to go to some party in Richmond but I dont' think I can or will make it really. I mean I'm not tryin' to hurl in the club or whatever. Whats ironic is that everytime I get sick I start to feel melancholy, and want to listen to some old school R&B, or British rock. Old school R&B like Video Soul, Video Vibrations, Midnight Love. British Rock like Portishead, Tricky (yes he is ROCK DAMMIT), Coldplay, etc.

I don't know why but i feel like just closing all the blinds in my office, sitting in complete darkness and wallowing in a mixture of depression, and self-pity when I'm sick like this. As you can see, I don't get sick often at all. On some level I think I may enjoying being sick every once in a while, it give me an excuse to do such behavior that I otherwise wouldnt' allow myself to indulge in.

Oh finally saw the Kanye West interview on MTV. That brother is something else, he's both eloquent and incoherent all at the same time. He talked about his homophobia, how he was sorta shady by signing with Jay-Z instead of Damon Dash. I mean he was making some really good points. He's an interesting person, very much so. After that, I watched the new Nick Cannon improv show. It reminds me of the little annoying brother version of SNL and Mad TV. But the rhyming was funny....DIVA EVA was up there. I mean she's so fine, she made the show worthwhile.
Then I watched the Andy Milkoansis (sp?) show that came on right after. Why is that show comedic genius! I swear I was laughing so hard my stomach hurt.

Just called my cuz, and told her I'm not going to Richmond, I feel sick....where is my ANITA & Coldplay!

My legs are sore!!!

Okay, yesterday I went to the gym after work talked to my gym buddy-uncle. Actually, my only pseudo-gym buddy-uncle, can't tell if he's friendly or more. So I just take his attention as friendly, so I did chest yesterday, and hit my abs like you wouldn't believe. I FINALLY did 200 bench press on the smith machine. By no means am I diesal, swole, or any other adjective that one uses to describe big in shape people. But I'm getting close, and I'm happy with my progress. I also did shoulders yesterday, which for me is probably my weakest and least worked area honestly. I don't know why, but I always get a sharp pain in my shoulders when I bench or do shoulders. But I took Hogg's (Mahogany) advice about mind over matter: "If you dont' mind it doesn't matter" 'nuff said.

So after I workout, I finally scheduled my gym time and public transportation to concide at the same time. But for some reason why did spend a good 30 mins in Giant looking for string, so I could rotisserie a chicken. So while I'm wandering through Giant, funky from the gym and hungry like a runaway slave I decide to buy some stuff. So ten minutes later I buy the ingredients to this BANGIN' spaghetti, tortellini, and beef ravoli dinner. Spending more money that I really planned on, but dammit! I was hungry.

Then even after that I had to buy the string at the CVS, great, just great.
I finally get home, and then hit the kitchen before I even take off my shoes. I preheat the oven so I can cook the twice baked potatoes, prepare and set the chicken, and boil water for the Italien fest I'm bout to tear down on. After I get all that working I then start my nighttime routine, I returned some calls. Got invited to some party in Richmond by my cuz. So I think I'll stop through.

Now, why today about four hours ago, I went and calculate the amount of money I spend on food for the last month period. Why was it more than 500 dollars. Now thats a dayum shame I'm spending a mortage on food. I'm not even FAT, hell I'm lean, what is really good. So from now on till October I ain't eatin' out. F, it I'll just have to starve and save my money.

Now its about 4:23, and y'all who know me, (oh that rhymes) knows its time for me to go. So bye for now!

Piss Poor Night

Piss Poor Night Current mood: pissed off

Okay, so after work I go to the gym. I did legs you know got to make sure that my body is healthy, hell I only have one for the rest of my life. Plus I've decided yesterday that I needed to take extreme care of my body b/c Black Gay Pride was only 9 days away, now its 8. So I have to make sure my body is on point, if nothing else it will build self confidence. But I digress, so after the gym, of course I miss the bus and have to walk 2 miles from the metro station back to my apt. I don't mind that, by now I'm used to it, and I choked it up as more cardio woohoo!!! So I'm home relaxin, pre-heat the oven, and then return some phone calls. Then hop in the shower b/c I smell like the funk of 1000 years, (hey I just came back from the gym what do you expect, roses!) then it happens.

The freakin' lights start to flicker, then while I'm in the shower, the lights go out. Great, just great. After about 30 seconds they come back online, so I'm like aight thats fine whatever. Then in a minute or two, the power goes OFF. So for the next 2 hours I proceed to feel my way around my apartment, turning off the oven, taking out the food I was cooking. Thankfully, I had cooked some food the night before and put it in my fridge. So I feel my way in the fridge and proceed to eat some cold ass chicken and rice. Great just great. I then say f it and just turn on all the lights in my apartment, and go take a nap until the power comes back on. Well I must have hit that deep sleep earlier than I expected b/c when I woke up I was really groggy. I returned on phone call to my cousin, and tried to cook but that didn't really work out. Got on the net to check my email. Tried to turn on the TV, but the cable box I think was blown out by the power outage b/c it won't turn on. Great just great

Thank you Dominion Power.

Random Writings

Random Writings today.

Today is going fairly well, tomorrow I'm going out to Dream, hopefully with the Grown & Sexy girls (you know who you are). It's going to be interesting since we haven't hung out in a minute altogether. Last time there were WORKIN' the crowd and came back with (ole man friend(s) ) ex-football players and whatnot. What did I get....nadda dayum thang. But hey thats how it is when I go to str8 clubs, hell that happens to me at gay clubs too LOL....

But regardless, it will be nice just to hang and chill with some good people. Now that I think about it am I becoming a club head, I mean I went out the last two weekends, this weekend, then September 1st I'm going to ATL for black pride. Hmm...the making of a club head....nah I think not.

I'm getting kind of excited about starting my one grad course I'm taking. Because this will be the first step in my five year plan, see the previous plan. I went to go check out the amount of books that I'll need. Tell me why, it was only three and one of them I still have from undergrad, I'm like are you serious is this a grad cake course or soemthing? Well, I'll be sure to spill the beans on the course once I take it.

Also, I went one of my friends from high school hit me up via good ole myspace and it was cool, we caught up, and exchanged info about various people we knew from high school. Its weird man, seems like MAD people from my high school are getting married and/or in the airforce.

5 year plan

Five year plans Current mood: hopeful

Those who know me know that I am always w/ a plan. Ever since I was about five or six years old, I have always been with one. Until recently, ever since I graduated from college have not put one together. For one reason or another I haven't had one, and without I've felt adrift in a sea of confusion. Yes dramatic I know but you get the idea. With that in mind, today at lunch I created a five year plan. Here it is so far. The first thing is to study for the LSAT and the GRE and to take them both during the fall, perferably in December. Then re-apply to Howard's Law School, simulatenously apply to George Mason's School of Public Policy, and Public Adminstration. Then when I get the results back, if I get accepted to all three great, I'll crip walk and declare that 2004 has all been worth it. Then look and talk to various people who have been in my situation, and see what they say, and make my decision. If I get into both programs at GMU then I'll decide between the two programs. Now, if I dont' get into any of the programs, then I'll cry. Then I'll just do the Peace Corps for a leave date that would concide w/ the end of your lease. If I get into HU only, then I'll go to HU law school with Peace Corps. After the Peace Corps Apply to USAID's International Development Intern program. Apply to USAID's New Professional Program. Apply the World's Banks various programs. Apply to Chemonics. Apply to try to get a job at Africare as a consultant, or program manager. Try to do more relief work for another year, through Crisis Corps. Get a job as an LC or LA on the Hill. As you can see, its all about getting into my field and going to Peace Corps, getting experience and getting into my field. So now I feel complete. I'm definitely on my GRIND!!!!!

Magic Drank!!!!

Good Morning to all…..
I just have to let you know that this weekend was ON POINT. I had a great time. First off by friend Aaron and I we were at Marshalls at 10:36 am to start shopping for clothes for the nighttime festivities. We shop in Marshalls and of course I don’t find anything, and neither does Aaron. So we decide to go shopping in Pentagon City, after going to Macy’s, Nordstrom, Aeropostale, Eddie Bauer, Up Against the Wall, Banana Republic, J.Crew, Gap, and a few more stores I forgot. I found a freakin’ t shirt…. all of that for a t shirt….great
On the bright side Aaron bought an outfit including shoes! Go Aaron! After that I persuaded Aaron to go to the gym with me, at Bally’s. There we are working out sweating and working out the arms and shoulders a little extra hard because we were going to the club that night. After all of this is said and done I head home, catch the metro, and the bus w/o more than a four minute wait in between. HOW HAPPY WAS I LOL ( the little things make me smile) Then for the next 7 or 8 hours I just pretty much b.s.’ed around nothing serious.
Around 10 pm I get a call from Aaron saying him and Steven are coming over at 11 and that we’ll be at the club at 12. I said OH HELLS NAH…(sidebar= neither one of them realized that the club closes at 5 am, and the Delta doesn’t get “hype” until 1:30) after that we compromised to leave at 1 and be there at 1:30….yea right. Fast forward, right before we leave I took another one of my boys advice to drink like two or three drinks before you go to the club so I did. But the thing is, I just started drinking like a year ago and I only drank two drinks per night like maybe once a month so my tolerance is nil. Needless to say after drinking I was sleepy in the car and in the back of my head I was like “This isn’t good, never should you be a little sleepy in the club”. So I get in the club and quickly go down stairs to the hell hole, for those of you who’ve never been or never will go to the Delta let me break it down. Upstairs for the majority of the night they play techno, downstairs they play hip-hop, dancehall and its crowded downstairs dangerously so.
Downstairs the music is on point, and its PACKED so I dance for sec see one of my prophytes, and then go stand in line to get a vodka and cranberry. I go back to the dancefloor after I get my drank (not drink) and start dancing with my crew, unfortunately Aaron was not blessed with the gifts of dance, or rhythm. But he can SANG, and he was in a marching band, I don’t get it. But I digress so of course I’m feelin’ good, feelin’ great and I go and dance by myself you know doing what I can with what I got. Then I notice that there is this brotha in a black wifebeater who is breakin it DOWN, (remember him) but of course it starts to get a little too crowded and I decide to walk around and get some air.
I then find Aaron and Steven near the bar and I ask what’s going on and Aaron, the non drinker asked for a ginger ale and they gave him a ginger ale with A LOT of vodka in a 20 ounce bottle. After Aaron argues and gets himself a real Ginger ALE, he give me this drank, which from now on will be called MAGIC!
By now you’re prolly wonderin’ why I call this devils brew magic, well after about 4 swallows of this drank I was NIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCEEEEEEEEE Not drunk, but buzzed, when the buzz came the inhibitions that usually I carry like a pledge carries burdens. I saw my boy Phil who is a grad student at HU (not the institute), and we started to dance and had a great time. We talked for a minute, then I saw this brotha who I used to remember seein’ him online, and then we started to dance for like four songs str8. FYI, I can’t sing, but I can dance like you wouldn’t believe, I’m not Omarion or Usher but I would be if I had the time money, and a choreographer just to tell ya’ll know. Now back to the story, so after we danced we talked for like a minute and then I gave him my number.
Then in five minutes I saw this one guy that I always to talk to, because I’ve seen him at church and in the gym. I already knew he was gay, but I was too inhibited to talk to him or anything. But thanks to Magic drank I was bold enough to, and granted I didn’t start off with the best line (I asked him do you go to “the Church of Unity of DC”) we talked for a minute, and he’s going to someone who I’ll make sure I’ll speak to him when I see him out again. After that or maybe before, I can’t really remember, I saw this really pretty girl, and she was dressed well, so I stepped to her too sidenote = to all my straight brothas, if I can step to a straight female and give her a compliment, then there is NO REASON why you shouldn’t do the same when you see something you like, and said “Hello, I just have to let you know that you’re the prettiest girl in here”. That seemed to brighten up her night, b/c after I said that she started to smile and dance more with that boy she came with.
The talking didn’t stop there I saw this brotha I used to talk to online and on the phone, and we just lost contact, and I stepped to him introduced myself and we had a great convo. It was pretty good, I gave him my new number and left it at that. What was funny was that he looked better in person and I told him that as well, thanks to the MAGIC drank.
After Mike, came I saw this handsome dark skin young looking guy, so I went up to him and asked him where was he from, and he said that he’s from DC, but then I asked where his people from. He said he’s parents are from Jamaica, and he was fine, young but fine like he had that whole West-Indian vibe going on, with the NICEST COLGATE smile. So I told him that he had a great smile. He was like really, no one has ever told him that, which I don’t believe but I told him regardless. Then I gave him my number, the Jamaican man.
So after that I started to hang out with Steven and Aaron, and Phil and we were just having fun, for some reason Steven and I were the only ones who were getting hyped to crunk. I guess gay men don’t want to dance to crunk. But after “knuck if you buck” they switched to GO-GO and you would have thought I was a STR8 DC head, box braids, slouch socks, and glitter tees LOL. So thanks to Magic I was just havin’ a great time.
Ok so after that I then wandered around by myself and found myself back on the dancefloor this time, next to the guy in the black tee from earlier, and again he was dancing this time I went to him and said “ Man I have to give you props, you’ve been breaking it down all night” he then said “well if I’ve been breaking it down how come this is the first time you’re saying something to me,” I was like oh okay let me find out….so we dance for 3 or 4 songs straight, and we talked he asked if I was single and of course I answered yes and asked him the same, he said he recently broke up with his bf who moved to Korea. Get this, he lives in the same city I do, which is rare b/c I live with a lot of Hispanic and Whites. After about song 3 or 4 we introduced ourselves and I said let me give you my number, and he was said “why , are you leaving now?” “No, I’m going to sit down I’m tired as hell.” He kept saying make sure you give me your number before you leave. So I was all psyched alright a goodlooking brotha was showing interest in me, the TYPE that I’m used to!
After that there was about 30 mins before the club closed so I just chilled and hung out, and had a good time with my boys. Now as luck would have it, did I see black tank top guy when the club closed….NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, I wasn’t pissed or anything, I just took it for what it is. If its meant to be I’ll see him again, if not he was just a part of a great night that I owed to losing my inhibitions and letting my guard down thanks to MAGIC DRANK.

FYI, I wasn’t drunk b/c the next day I woke at 9 30 am and cooked breakfast for my boys b/c they stayed the night, granted I woke up with a lil bit of a headache but hey, small price to pay!